100 Feet

After watching this movie for the second time, I can say I was disappointed. The first time through watching it, a couple months ago, I found it to be pretty enjoyable. But the second time through, I was not quite as impressed with it.

100 Feet stars Famke Janssen who is probably best known for her part in the X-Men trilogy. The movie begins with her being released from prison to begin three years in home arrest for killing her husband who was a cop. She is relegated to being within 100 feet of her house, but she soon finds that her husband is haunting the house. The first half hour or so of the movie introduces the viewers to the character and gives her time to try to make us like her. Well, that's not done too well. I don't feel too sorry for her throughout the movie. Ok, wife beating is wrong, but she isn't too sympathatic. She runs around in terrible clothing with a stupid look on her face throughout most of the movie. Many portions of the movie just make me laugh. Her crack addict friend from prison calls her and tells her to "come visit" and then hangs up. Famke starts seducing a barely legal boy while she is barely out of prison; the boy also a criminal. Birds of a feather flock together. She finds money and gives it to a priest who then refuses to bless the house. What a prick. I would have takent he money back and told him to go screw himself.

Since it is a ghost movie, it obviously won't make much sense from the get-go, but the movie leaves many plot holes. The manner in which she gets rid of the ghost leaves us with many questions. She finds a homeless guy in the basement and he says he came in through the window, and later in the movie, the window is closed with no explanation. She is allowed to go 100 Feet within her home but she can't even get to the front door or the basement. The front door looks less than 100 foot from the box.

Regarding the gore and blood, there is little blood in this movie and no gore. There is one decent death scene but it is CGI and looks terribly fake. The ghost is pretty well done for a ghost, if you can say such a thing. There was some though put into the design of the ghost and he can be quite menancing in some scenes. Actually pretty much all the blood in the movie is CGI except for the "mysterious" blood on the wall and the little bits on Famke. I wish the whole movie world knew that CGI blood always looks fakey. Using "real" blood is always the better choice, but many movies are turning to fake CGI blood these days. Shame on you.

Ok, it's a Sci Fi Original Channel movie, so it's not going to be high budget and perfect. It's a decent ghost movie with many plot holes and a pretty unlikeable protagonist. I will give it 2.5 out of 5. It's not terrible, but it's not super either.

Rose Red

This movie was actually a mini-series that ran on TV in 2001. The DVD running time on this movie is 243 minutes....so you have to really like this movie to sit through the whole thing. I am ashamed to admit, but I have watched his movie around 10 times. It is technically a horror movie, but it is only rated PG-13 so you know its going to be pretty tame. A noteworthy plus for this movie is that the screenplay was written by Stephen King, the master of modern horror.

A team of psychics led by Dr. Joyce Reardon, a psychology professor, investigates the decrepit Seattle, Washington, mansion known as Rose Red in an attempt to discover scientific proof that ghosts exist. The mansion is thought to be haunted and quite a few people have disappeared or died there. The Reardon team's efforts unleash various spirits and uncover the horrifying secret of the house itself.

The characters in this movie are well developed and complex, as there was definitely enough time to do so. The characters are diverse in personality and in psychic abilities. Each character gets his or her chance to show their abilities during the course of the movie. As they explore deeper and deeper into the never-ending halls of Rose Red, they see more terrifying psychic events. The movie centers around Joyce Reardon, the psychology professor, who wishes to explore Rose Red to further her career and her exploitation of a 15-year-old autistic girl with tremendous psychic abilities including telekinesis and telepathy. My favourite character was Emery, played by Matt Ross of American Psycho fame, an obnoxious mama's boy with retrocognition, the ability to see the past, who seems to be the most pragmatic of the whole group when everything begins to fall apart. Another one of the psychic characters is played by Emily Deschanel who is most famous for starring in the crime drama "Bones." There is even a small cameo by Stephen King as a pizza delivery man.

The sets are beautiful, especially of the interior of the house. Large pillars, marble floors, glass rooms, long hallways. The dream home of many people.

The movie is not scary by any stretch of the imagination. The "dead" people in the movie look fake. Supernatural events in a movie are generally not very scary anyway. There are a few intense scenes near the middle of the movie where the characters are running through the woods, discovering their friends dead. Some of the CGI effects are a little corny.

My biggest complaint about the movie, other than the corny dialogue, is the constant camera panning of the mansion. It probably takes up a good half hour of the house, just repetitious pans of the exterior and interior of the house paired with annoying ghostly whispers and occasionally a shitty ass narrative by Dr. Reardon.

Overall, good haunted house movie. A bit long, mostly due to the constant obnoxious camera panning of the mansion. Good character development, decent special effects. A must see for haunted house movie fans. I give it 3 our of 5 stars.

Unrest

Unrest is yet another film from the "8 Films to Die For" line-up. This movie won Best Picture for Horror at the 2006 International Horror and Sci-Fi film festival. Well, I don't know how that happened.

The film follows some new medical students after their first day in gross anatomy lab. They have to autopsy a cadaver, but the main character feels an 'unrest' about the body. Everybody who comes in contact with the body begins to die and the main character must put the spirit of the body to rest before she ends up dead too.

The plot is a supernatural horror, which I am not a fan of. I am unsure how a spirit kills someone in the brutal ways depicted in the film. If I suspend disbelief for this movie, then its an okay movie. The kill scenes are pretty gory and the constant pan-overs of the autopsied body are unsettling.

The trailer for the film says it was filmed in a real morgue, using real bodies. I don't know if this is true or not. The director of the film was a medical doctor and he says he tried to make the bodies look as real as possible. He did a good job at that.

I guess I'm pretty ambivalent about this film. I had higher expectations for it and I did not really like the supernatural element in the film. But, the gory is above average for a low-budget film. If you want to see a movie with a confusing plot but nice gore scenes, this is it. I will give it a 2.5 out of 5 stars.

Lake Dead

This is yet another movie from the 8 Films to Die for After Dark Horrorfest. The follows a group of teenagers who inherit a motel on a lake, only to uncover a series of dark and frightening family secrets.

This is another movie in the seemingly endless parade of horror films about family incest and deformities. Wrong Turn anyone? But while the plot is still stale, the movie is quite enjoyable. The movie is not what you would watch if you wanted a serious, dark horror film. But if you are looking for an entertaining little movie with tits for no reason, bong hits for fuck's sake, and some good ole' family incest, then watch Lake Dead.

The acting in this movie ranges from subpar to average. It's not so bad that you want to turn the film off, but its not gonna win any Emmy's either. There is little character development, which is average for such horror movies as this. But, the characters are not completely unlikable. Nothing gives a good movie a boner kill as when you want the characters to die.

The blood and gore in this movie is relegated to being shown after the action has occurred, which is a pet peeve of mine. If you are going to have the violence, then show us. Don't just show us the foot after its been bashed in. Had this movie had the guts to show the gore that horror movie fans crave, then it would have received another star from me. So much of the killing was done off screen that I was unsure if some of the characters had been killed or not. But after not seeing them for a while, I realised that they must be dead. What a waste of a good death!

The dialogue is as is to be expected from a movie like this. It's laughable, cheesy, but if you know that's what to expect, then its not too bad. The best line was when the one individual who is related to the one he shoots, he says "This is how you fuck family" as the character is shot, off screen of course. Some movie reviewers have belittled this line, but I think it was a witty reference to the incest that destroyed the family. Kudos to whomever put that line in the script.

So, all in all, I will give it a 2.5 out of 5 stars. It's not amazing, but its not unwatchable. The blood and gore are lacking from this movie, but that seems to be the tendency in horror movies anyway.

Wicked Little Things

This is one of the "After Dark Horrorfest 8 Films to Die For" that was released in 2006. This movie is definitely not to die for... maybe to die from after watching though.

The movie first starts out with showing orphaned children being worked to death, literally, in a mine during the early 1900's. Then it cuts to modern day and a mother and her two daughters are moving to an abandoned, decrepit cabin that was left by the woman's late husband. You can already tell this is going to be a really great movie by the fact that the plot is so original. A family moving to some shitty ass cabin in the woods that no one knows anything about?? That's never been done before! So a bunch of creepy stuff happens, blah blah, the youngest daughter befriends a mysterious girl, blah blah, half zombie children come out of the woods only at night to terrorize people who happen to get in their way....but at least everyone is safe during the day. Cause it only happens at night, the reason for which is never explained. A few subplots are introduced, including drunken teens partying in a car, some creepy ass guy creeping around with little explanation as to why, and a real estate developer intent on screwing everyone over in the area.

So, now that you know the basic plot, don't go see it. The movie's pacing is quiet slow. I wanted to turn it off at times and go do something else, like go take a dump or stare blankly at the wall mumbling "why did I pay for this movie?" But, I mustered the courage to finish the movie.

If you want to see a movie with no plot but a lot of gore, still don't see it. All of the kill scenes are off camera. There's no gratuitous blood squirting or intestines flying. Just off screen screams and post kill blood dripping on characters. I mean, look at the pink blood on the character pictured above. Enough said.

Another thing that really drove me nuts is that the mother of the children looked to be about 2 seconds older than her oldest child. Really super casting decisions.

Why did I have some expectation that this might be a bearable movie? Beats the hell out of me, but as soon as I figure it out, I will let you know.

The plot is boring and lame, the gore is minimal, but the actual film it is shot on is high quality. I will give it a 1.5 out of 5 stars. This movie might be for some, but it wasn't for me.

Cloverfield

I am just flat out physically nauseated after watching this smut. Not because it was frightening, but because of the damn shaky camera work. This movie has been hailed as a masterpiece for cinema verita where the movie is being filmed as if it were a home video. Goddamn filmmakers. Slapping shit together of someone running and dropping a camera and shaking the camera is not filmmaking. It's bad reality television. This movie has truly made me hate this style of filmmaking even more than I already did. Filmmakers think it makes the movie more real for the viewer. No, it just shows the low budget of the film by shaking the camera so you can't actually see anything except peoples feet while they are running. Great job!

Basically, the movie is about an attack on New York City by a large, nameless monster told through the home movie of teenagers. Even the characters in this movie are douchebags. I really don't give a damn what happens to them merely 5 minutes after the movie starts. They have no depth, no development. Just a bunch of kids running around trying to be heroes. The only redeemable acting in this movie is by actress Lizzy Caplan who plays a sarcastic girl in the wrong place at the wrong time. Her acting was the only believable acting in the whole movie. The so-called hero is a pompous douchebag who is blindly followed around by his friends.

I give some praise to the monster in this movie. While not terribly original, it is still better than some monsters in monster movies. It vaguely resembles a bat with no wings. The movie makers also throw in some smaller versions of the large tyrant in order to make the attack more personal and up close. No explanation for the attack is offered. Probably for the best actually. Any explanation given by these lazy flmmakers would have made the film that much less believable or likable.

It is truly such a pity cause this could have been a good movie. The idea of a gigantic havoc-wrecker plundering NYC is not new, but a well-made monster movie is always welcomed by me. But, better camera work, better script, and better actors are necessary to solve the many problems with this movie.

I give it 2 out of 5 stars. The only reasons for 2 instead of 1 is Lizzy Caplan's above average acting and the development of a semi-unique creature.

Autopsy

Autopsy was part of the After Dark Horrorfest line up for 2008, as was the brilliant Frontiere(s) and the most horrid Dark Ride. There is a large space between those two films for this one to fall in. Luckily, Autopsy was closer to Frontiere(s) than to Dark Ride. Concededly this gory flick is low budget, but it works well within its constraints.

The plot is old and used, but suspenseful enough. Five teenagers get in a car accident and are transported to a hospital where Hippocratic Oath is thrown out the window. The movie is pretty predictable. You discover pretty quickly why the doctor is cutting up his patients, but it still does not ruin the fun. The main character, Emily, runs through the halls in the maze of a hospital trying to rescue her boyfriend. She happens upon the horrid things the doctor is doing and even suffers the brunt of some of these experiments. Robert Patrick who is best known as playing the T1000 in Terminator 2 plays the doctor in this film and the nurse is played by John Conner's foster mother. These famous actors help spice up the otherwise low-budget film. One of the teenagers is tripping on some unknown medicine throughout the whole film which brings some much needed levity to the intense scenes.

The gore in this movie really redeems all the flaws brought on by the tired script and sometimes lousy acting. There is good scare after good scare lined up with some of the most bloody disturbing scenes in a movie. One scene is highly reminiscent of Eli Roth's Hostel in which an orderly sands the fingerprints from a hand while standing in a room filled with severed body parts. There is one scene in the movie which is sure to disturb even the most hardened gorehound. But, I won't spoil it for you.

Overall, good scares, average plot, some good acting, some bad acting, 3 out of 5 stars. So, grab your rib separator and crack open this movie.

Saw 6

It really is true when the critics say Saw fans have reclaimed their franchise. I have loved the Saw films and held them to be my favourite horror movies...until Saw 4. And then after the garbage that was Saw 5, I was less than enthusiastic to watch the newest Saw.

This movie had more screen time for Tobin Bell who is the star of the franchise and also for Shawnee Smith who had been ignored since Saw 3. I had really resented Hoffman's claim to the Jigsaw legacy that was revealed in Saw 4, but this movie developed his character. Hoffman throughout the movie was walking the fine line between cool killer and raving psychopath as his secret begins to be discovered. In fact, the character development of Hoffman was really what made this movie. By the end of the movie, you begin questioning who it really is that you should be rooting for.

As always, the traps are brutal and beautifully intricate. In the opening sequence, one character is forced to cut off her own arm in a frenzy. This harkens back to Dr. Gordon's maniacal, desperate last act from the first Saw. Also, the main participant in the games has to make gut wrenching decisions as to who lives and dies. The plot in this one was less convoluted than the contrived plots of Saw 4 & 5. This was an enjoyable movie-going experience as opposed to the puzzling events of Saw 4.

I will stop my review here so as not to spoil the movie.

Let this Saw bring the fans back to the franchise and the good reputation the series once held!

4 out of 5 stars. Great job!

Dark Ride

All I can say is I just wasted 90 minutes of my life. This movie is terrible. I'm hoping to spare you the same pain I endured.

The plot is very basic and juvenile. Some oversexed college kids decide to spend the night in a dark ride. Dark ride is defined by Wikipedia as "an indoor amusement ride where riders in guided vehicles travel through specially lit scenes that typically contain animation, sounds, music, and other special effects" The so-called Dark Ride in this film was a horror themed ride, depicting devils, murder, and other horrific scenes. The movie begins with in 1989 with twins being murdered in the dark ride and the murderer being sent to an insane asylum. The story then moves to the college kids going on a road trip. The characters are cliche and not deserving of any sympathy. Just die already and let me reclaim my life. The characters aren't even aware that they are in a horror movie until an hour into the movie. Real effective. Lame story, lame characters, just lame.

Even the special effects in this movie are lame. The blood is too red; it looks fakey. The killer in this movie just looks like a big retard bumbling around and lurking in the shadows. He has super human strength and runs around in a straight jacket. I saw the the twist at the end coming from a million miles away. This movie is the cinematic equivalent of a 5 year old child with downs syndrome. No offense intended.

Is there anything redeeming about this movie? After thinking hard and long about this, the answer is no. The only thing worse than this movie is the fact that I spent even more time on it by writing this review.

Don't rent or buy this movie. It is only promoting trashy low-budget "horror" films. Go watch paint drying instead -- it is ultimately less painful than this movie.

One of five stars. Go to hell.

Eden Lake

Eden Lake is a 2008 UK horror film. And a brilliantly executed one at that. Jenny and her boyfriend Steve escape for the weekend to Eden Lake, a picturesque quarry, where Steve hopes to propose to Jenny. But their peace is disrupted by a group of teenage hooligans who have no respect for anyone. This angers Steve who tries to talk to their parents. But Jenny and Steve find themselves in a horrifying situation when the kids steal their car and begin their torture.

Both of the protagonists are pretty likable. A few times through the movie, Steve's actions baffled me. It seems like maybe he should have grown up and bit and moved to a different part of the lake rather than confronting the chavs. But then again we wouldn't have this movie had he done that! Jenny is a very likable lead in this movie, really stepping up to the plate when the time comes. The actress who plays Jenny shows raw emotion with which the viewer can identify with. Many Hollywood horror flicks have main characters who are unlikable and which the viewer cheers when they are chopped up. Not to name any movies.... Remake of Friday the 13th. Eden Lake has very developed characters which you really hope they make it through the ordeal. Even the kids who torment our happy couple are played by good young actors. The antagonists really make your stomach churn and feel disgusted while feeling a little sorry for some of them.

The movie is well paced, although a little monotonous a times during the perpetual scenes of Jenny's running through the woods. The gore is minimal for a horror movie. There is some bleeding, but no guts flying through the air. Many of the scenes that would normally show violence are not seen in this film, probably due to the fact that kids are involved. Despite the lack of gratuitous gore, the violent bloody scenes are well executed and praiseworthy.

Overall, good movie. I will give it a 3.5 out of 5 stars. A must see for true horror fans.

Haute Tension (FR)/ High Tension (US)

Another French horror movie, High Tension is a good example of the new French Extremity. High Tension has been hailed, along with Frontiere(s) and Inside, as a classic example of this sub-genre. The movie was directed by Alexandre Aja who also directed the respectable remake of The Hills Have Eyes. The movie was aptly named as there is High Tension throughout most of the movie.

The movie begins with a somber entrance, a girl in medical gown repeating herself and then the girl running through the woods frightened. Then it cuts to the story and the mood is changed quickly as two girls drive in the French Country side talking about guys and playing pop music. But this movie is a cut above most Hollywood horror films. It is not a bubblegum pop type horror films with naked chicks running around and good scares for the hell of it. This movie remains solemn and somber throughout, genuinely trying to disturb the viewer. The killer is a gruff burly man who looks like a typical serial killer. The beginning of the movie is face paced and gory. But then the movie becomes a little slow. Actually, painstakingly slow as the main character hides from the killer in the house and then in a gas station. But, then it picks up pace again toward the end and finishes off with a twist.

Sure didn't see that one coming!

The ending of this movie has been criticised by many as a cheap US throwback that ruins the storyline. But others hail it as a surprising and refreshing twist. I, personally, am wavering in between. The ending adds some depth to the story line that wasn't otherwise there. But it also confuses the hell out of the viewer and makes a second viewing of the movie untenable.

Overall, plot is decent. Music is really good, always setting the tone purposefully and adequately. Acting is above average. I give kudos to the girl who is tied up most of the movie. The large gag in her mouth sure does not look comfortable. And the gore is impressive throughout most of the movie. I give this French horror movie a 4 out of 5 stars.

Frontiere(s)

This is a French horror film, obviously in French. I always watch foreign films in the original language with English subtitles. I cannot stand dubbing. This movie is about some kids who took advantage of the riots in Paris and stole some money. They are escaping to rural France, hoping to head out of the country. They have the misfortune of staying at an inn where the family running it is a family of Nazi cannibals trying to create the perfect race

The plot is a little weak honestly. There are a lot of questions unanswered and some of the character's actions do not make much sense. The father of the family spouts a lot of dogma about a pure race but it does not make sense. This may be due to bad subtitles though.

Also, the main character's acting drives me nuts. She runs around shaking like she is in some kind of perpetual seizure. I can understand it if it started happening at the end of the movie, but just as soon as she starts being beat she starts into convulsions and never stops. Many of the characters are unlikeable. Even the so-called protagonists are mere criminals who try to act tough but turn out just to be big pussies. Only one of the characters of the Nazi family is likable, a young deformed woman named Eva. She tries to help the female protagonist throughout the movie.

While I spent the last two paragraph talking about the negatives, I must point out the positives. The gore in this movie is not as much as you would think for a French horror film, but it is quite respectable. There are fingers getting severed, saws chopping through people, and people hung up on butcher hooks. The protagonist runs through the last part of the movie covered head to toe with blood, much like the protagonist in The Descent. Another positive about this movie is that while a lot of movies have the strong alpha woman who "surprises" audiences with her "hidden" strength and this movie has that too, it is much more subdued. The protagonist in this movie does not become emotionally strong and beat off all the bad guys. Instead she whimpers and cries and shakes through the ordeal while still getting the job done. This is a lot more realistic than the weak woman to super woman theme we have seen in a lot of recent horror movies.

French Horror movies are my favourite so I am a bit biased in my review. Overall, the plot is moderately weak, the gore is above average but not the best, but the tone of the movie helps make up for these pitfalls. I give it 3.5 out of 5 stars. A good movie for true horror fans.

The Killing Gene (US Title) | wΔz (UK Title)

The hardest part of the first posting is deciding which movie to rate and review. I'm lazy and I'm going to take the easy way out and review a movie I just watched.

The summary can be found here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/W_delta_z

The plot is basically about a woman who forces people to chose to kill someone they love or be tortured.

I purchased this movie based upon reviews about it in Internet Movie Database. Most of the reviews said that it was a good film with a lot of brutality. In all honesty, I was quite disappointed by the lack of brutality and gore. There are a couple scenes that make the viewer want to wince, such as when a nail is driven under the nailbed of person, but even these aren't graphic. The tone of the film is dark and gritty. It's set in always-night New York city, depicting the city in the worst light imaginable full of gangs and violence.

The movie is thought-provoking though. I will always try not to include spoilers, but there is a twist in the movie that I did not see coming. It was a unique twist that most movies don't do.

I think perhaps the worst part of the movie is Selma Blair. I really do not like her acting. It is always so pouty.

Introduction

I wanted to just delve right into tearing apart horror movies and then squishing their entrails between my fingers...but I figured I should take a brief stop and tell you, the reader, what this is all about.

Some background on me might be helpful. I am 21 years old and I live in beautiful Scottsdale, AZ. I am a law student due to graduate in December. I am also a part time modeller, always looking for new ideas. The first movie that I absolutely fell in love with was Hannibal. I was in seventh grade and my mom took me to see the Hannibal movie. And she took me to see it 3 or 4 more times in theatres. To this day, Hannibal is a beautiful example of Horror films in their finest. Ever since my first dip into the pool of the horror film victim's blood, I never looked back.

Most people view horror films as not as worthy as other films such as romances, comedies, or action movies. This is, in part, due to the origins of horror films. Early horror film-making was low budget. Over the last century, there have been waves of resurgent interest in horror films. I will look back only as far to the 1970s to summarise the trends.

In the early 1970's, horror films became more graphic and brutal with such movies as the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre and George A. Romero's Dawn of the Dead. Many more good films came out during the 70's. But, horror films turned into smut as there were numerous low-budget sequels spawned to profit from the success of the earlier films. In the early 1990's, there was still some interest in the sequels that had been continually produced. But the horror genre took a big hit in the early 90s for two main reasons: People grew tired of the non-stop proliferation of slasher movies from the 80s. And the adolescent audience for the horror films grew up, with the new adolescents preferring to watch science fiction movies with the advent of good computer animated graphics in movies.

In the mid 90's, there was a small resurgence in interest in horror movies with the release of Wes Craven's Scream. This film mocked the cliques of previous horror films. I Know What You Did Last Summer and Urban Legend led to increased interest in slasher films. Going into the new century, horror films had been relatively quiet. But that changed dramatically with the remaking of Japanese horror films into American versions, known as J-Horror. There was also a return to the zombie sub-genre of horror films with Dawn of the Dead, 28 Days Later, and Land of the Dead.

But the most noticed trend in horror films is what critics call "torture porn." These movies depict extreme cruelty, gore, violence, and sex. The pink elephant in the room is the Saw franchise. Due to the popularity of the Saw movies, many other filmmakers have tried to copy their style. Some are hit and some are miss. Some examples of this genre are Hostel, The Devil's Rejects (depicted right), and Captivity.

Now that you've had your history lesson, I will clearly state what types of horror movies I enjoy more or less and try to factor this in for my critique of a film. I don't want my bias to trash a good film merely because I don't like ghost stories. So, being aware of my preferences can help me be more disinterested in the evaluation. I prefer ultra violent, gore fest movies, such as the Saw movies. Saw and Hostel are two of my favourite films. I also love zombie movies. But, I almost unanimously hate J-Horror. And I don't really care for supernatural horror films.

We shall swiftly begin our descent into hell, all just to find the best horror movie.